Relaxed Eating 101: Overcoming Stress to Build a Healthier Relationship with Food

Stress eating is an incredibly common response to the pressures of modern life. In a world where stress is a constant companion, our eating habits often reflect the potential chaos of our lives. Many of us turn to food for comfort when we're feeling overwhelmed, anxious, or stressed. However, this coping mechanism often leads to overeating, poor food choices, and a cycle of guilt and shame that can be hard to break. Lasting change is possible and the first step to building healthier and happier relationship with food is becoming a relaxed eater.

At Eat At Ease Counselling, we understand that stress eating is not just about a lack of willpower or self-control. It's deeply rooted in how our bodies and minds respond to stress. We help our clients move away from stress eating and toward a healthier, more relaxed relationship with food, through addressing the underlying causes of stress eating and developing strategies for managing stress in more effective, sustainable and individual ways.

Chronic vs. Acute Stress: The Impact on Your Body and Mind

To better understand stress eating, it's important to distinguish between acute and chronic stress. In ‘Why Zebras Don't Get Ulcers’, Robert Sapolsky explains that acute stress is a short-lived, immediate response to a perceived threat, such as a zebra escaping a predator. This kind of stress is beneficial for survival—it triggers the fight-or-flight response, which helps the body to react quickly in dangerous situations.

However, humans often experience chronic stress, which is persistent and long-lasting. Unlike acute stress, chronic stress keeps the body in a constant state of alert, which can have detrimental effects on both physical and mental health. While acute stress can be protective, chronic stress is harmful, contributing to a wide range of health issues, including heart disease, depression, and yes—stress eating.

When you're chronically stressed, your body continuously produces stress hormones like cortisol, which can lead to increased appetite, cravings for unhealthy foods, and a tendency to overeat. This constant state of stress can also disrupt your digestion, slow down your metabolism, and make it harder for your body to process and assimilate nutrients. As a result, stress eating becomes not just a psychological issue but a physiological one as well.

The Role of Cortisol: How Stress Hormones Affect Eating Habits

Cortisol, often referred to as the "stress hormone," plays a crucial role in how our bodies respond to stress. Cortisol is essential during acute stress situations—it helps mobilize energy and prepares the body for action. However, when cortisol levels remain elevated over long periods due to chronic stress, it can lead to significant health problems.

One of the most concerning effects of chronic cortisol elevation is its impact on eating behaviours. High cortisol levels are associated with increased appetite, particularly for high-fat and high-sugar foods—those "comfort foods" that we often crave when stressed. This is because cortisol triggers the brain's reward system, making these foods seem more appealing and satisfying. This creates a cycle where stress leads to eating for comfort, which in turn reinforces the habit, making stress eating a challenging behaviour to overcome.

Moreover, cortisol's effects aren't limited to increasing appetite. It also affects how your body processes food. High cortisol levels can slow down metabolism, making it more difficult to burn calories and leading to weight gain. Additionally, cortisol can impair the body's ability to regulate blood sugar, contributing to insulin resistance and increasing the risk of type 2 diabetes.

In the context of stress eating, understanding the role of cortisol is crucial. If you’re eating under stress, your body is not just hungry—it's responding to a complex hormonal signal that tells you to eat more, often leading to overeating and poor food choices. By learning to manage stress effectively, you can reduce cortisol levels, curb the cravings, and develop a more balanced, healthy approach to eating.

The Impact of Stress on Digestion

During a stress response, the body prioritizes functions that are essential for immediate survival, such as increasing heart rate and redirecting blood flow to muscles. As a result, non-essential functions like digestion take a backseat.

When you're stressed, your digestive system doesn't function as efficiently. Blood flow to the stomach and intestines is reduced, leading to issues like indigestion, bloating, and constipation. Furthermore, stress can slow down the movement of food through the digestive tract, which can cause discomfort and make you feel sluggish. Over time, chronic stress can lead to more serious digestive disorders, such as irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) or acid reflux.

Stress also affects the body's ability to absorb nutrients. When digestion is compromised, your body may not fully break down food or absorb the vitamins and minerals it needs. This can lead to nutrient deficiencies, which in turn can exacerbate stress and fatigue, creating a vicious cycle.

The connection between stress and digestion is a powerful reminder of the importance of relaxed eating. When you approach your meals with a sense of calm and mindfulness, you create an environment in which your body can properly digest and absorb nutrients, supporting overall health and well-being. Relaxed eating isn’t just about enjoying your food more—it's about allowing your body to function at its best.

The Mind-Body Connection: How Stress Affects Eating Behaviours

Psychological stressors can lead to physical symptoms and behaviours, including changes in eating habits. The brain and body are deeply interconnected, and what affects one will inevitably impact the other.

For example, when you're stressed, your brain may signal a need for comfort, leading you to seek out food as a way to soothe negative emotions. This is where emotional eating comes into play. Emotional eating is often driven by a desire to "numb" uncomfortable feelings, whether they are stress, sadness, anxiety, or even boredom. However, while food may provide temporary relief, it doesn't address the underlying issues and can lead to feelings of guilt and shame afterward.

The mind-body connection also explains why stress can lead to cravings for specific types of foods, particularly those high in fat and sugar. These foods activate the brain's reward system, providing a temporary sense of pleasure and relief from stress. However, this relief is short-lived, and the cycle of stress and unhealthy eating continues.

By understanding the mind-body connection, we can see that stress eating is not just a matter of willpower but a complex interplay between our psychological and physical states. Addressing stress at its source, rather than simply trying to control eating behaviour, is key to breaking the cycle of stress eating and developing a healthier relationship with food.

Practical Steps to Becoming a Relaxed Eater

Now that we've explored the ways in which stress impacts eating habits, digestion, and overall health, let's turn to practical strategies for becoming a more relaxed eater. At Eat At Ease, we encourage our clients to take a holistic approach to their eating habits, which includes focusing on mindfulness, stress management, and creating a supportive environment.

1. Mindful Eating: Bringing Awareness to Your Meals

Mindful eating is one of the most effective ways to shift from stress eating to relaxed eating. It involves paying full attention to the eating experience—savouring the flavours, textures, and smells of your food, and noticing how your body feels before, during, and after eating. Mindful eating helps you slow down, enjoy your food more, and recognize your body's hunger and fullness cues.

To practice mindful eating, start by removing distractions. Turn off the TV, put away your phone, and focus solely on your meal. Take a few deep breaths before you start eating to calm your mind and body. As you eat, chew slowly and thoroughly, and pay attention to the sensory experience of eating. Notice the taste, texture, and aroma of each bite. This practice not only enhances your enjoyment of food but also helps you tune into your body's signals, preventing overeating.

While mindful eating can be a powerful tool for many individuals seeking to improve their relationship with food, it’s important to recognize that it may not be effective or appropriate for everyone.

2. Breathing Techniques to Reduce Stress

Breathing exercises are a simple yet powerful way to reduce stress and promote relaxation. When you're stressed, your breathing tends to become shallow and rapid, which can exacerbate feelings of anxiety and tension. By practicing deep, rhythmic breathing, you can activate the body's relaxation response that promotes lower cortisol levels.

Before a meal, take a few minutes to practice deep breathing. Inhale slowly through your nose, allowing your abdomen to rise as you fill your lungs with air. Hold the breath for a moment, then exhale slowly through your mouth. Repeat this process several times, focusing on the rhythm of your breath. This simple practice can help you enter a more relaxed state, making your mealtime experience more enjoyable and less stressful.

3. Creating a Relaxed Eating Environment

Your eating environment plays a significant role in how you experience your meals. A chaotic, stressful environment can make it difficult to relax and enjoy your food, leading to rushed eating and poor digestion. On the other hand, a calm, peaceful environment can enhance your eating experience and support mindful eating.

Consider the setting where you eat your meals. Is it cluttered, noisy, or filled with distractions? If so, take steps to create a more relaxing space. This could mean setting the table with care, playing soft music, or lighting a candle. If you have young children or other responsibilities, try to set aside at least one meal a day where you can eat in peace, even if it's just for a few minutes.

4. Managing Time and Expectations

One of the biggest obstacles to relaxed eating is the feeling of being rushed. In our fast-paced world, it's easy to feel like there's never enough time to eat mindfully. However, managing your time and expectations can make a big difference.

Start by carving out dedicated time for meals, even if it's just 15 or 20 minutes. Treat mealtime as a non-negotiable part of your day, just like any other important activity. During this time focus solely on eating, without multitasking or rushing. If you find yourself constantly in a hurry, reflect on your schedule and identify areas where you can slow down. This might mean waking up a bit earlier to have a calm breakfast or setting boundaries around your lunch break to ensure you have time to eat without interruptions.

Additionally, managing expectations around mealtime can help reduce stress. Not every meal needs to be perfect or elaborate. Sometimes, a simple, nourishing meal eaten with awareness is more beneficial than a rushed, gourmet dish. Give yourself permission to prioritize relaxation over perfection in your eating habits.

5. Understanding and Regulating Discomfort

Stress often triggers discomfort, both physically and emotionally. Many people turn to food as a way to medicate or soothe this discomfort. However, learning to regulate discomfort without relying on food is crucial for overcoming stress eating.

Start by becoming more aware of your emotional triggers. When you feel the urge to eat in response to stress, pause and check in with yourself. What are you really feeling? Is it anxiety, sadness, boredom, or something else? Once you've identified the emotion, consider other ways to address it. This might include practicing deep breathing, going for a walk, journaling, or talking to a friend.

Over time, building resilience to discomfort and finding alternative ways to manage it can significantly reduce your reliance on food as a coping mechanism. This not only helps with stress eating but also fosters emotional growth and self-awareness.

Trusting the Process: The Journey to Relaxed Eating

Becoming a relaxed eater is not something that happens overnight. It's a gradual process that requires patience, practice, and self-compassion. At Eat At Ease , we believe in taking small, steady steps toward lasting change. It's important to celebrate each victory, no matter how small, and to approach setbacks with kindness rather than self-criticism.

One of the most significant aspects of this journey is redefining what success looks like. Rather than focusing solely on outcomes like weight loss or a perfect diet, success can be measured by improvements in your relationship with food, increased mindfulness, and a greater sense of peace and well-being.

Remember that how you approach food often reflects how you approach life. By learning to eat more mindfully and with greater relaxation, you're also learning to navigate life's challenges with more ease and grace. This work is about more than just changing your eating habits—it's about transforming your overall experience of life.

The Mindful Path to Wellbeing

Stress eating is a complex issue rooted in both physiological and psychological factors. Chronic stress, high cortisol levels, and the mind-body connection all play significant roles in how we eat and how our bodies respond to food.

At Eat At Ease, our goal is to help clients break free from the cycle of stress eating by becoming more mindful, relaxed eaters. Through practical strategies like mindful eating, deep breathing, and creating a supportive environment, we empower individuals to make lasting changes that support their overall health and well-being.

This journey is not about quick fixes or perfection—it's about embracing the process of change with patience and compassion. As you learn to regulate your stress and bring more mindfulness to your meals, you'll discover that food can be a source of nourishment and joy, rather than a source of stress. Ultimately, the path to relaxed eating is also a path to more relaxed, fulfilling life.